I am a Wagner opera-goer. Wherever there is a Ring Cycle, I will be there.

But I am a child of the South, and my father was a Grand Ol’ Opry fan.

I recall him on Saturday nights listening to the opry with his ear close to our old upright radio, as big as a refrigerator. He would say to us, “Now younguns, if you don’t be quiet while daddy listens to Roy Acuff sing, I won’t take you to town tomorrow.”

A trip to town meant we filled my father’s three-seater Packard—mama and daddy in the front seat, my two sisters, Margaret and Von, in the middle seat, and our old cook, Aunt Sue Lang, and I in the back seat. Aunt Sue Lang had delivered me because Camden County, Georgia, had only one doctor in the county.

It took so long for my father to locate the sole doctor that he was too late for my delivery. But Aunt Sue Lang was an adept obstetrician and delivered me herself.

As a treat when we were good, daddy took us to town. We would go bumping over Georgia unpaved roads with the dust boiling up behind us to the tiny town of White Oak, Georgia, which consisted of the post office, three fillin’ stations, a five-and-dime, several grocery stores, and a bazillion churches. Some favored foot-washing rituals. My Episcopal family had to drive to Waycross to go to church.

With a background like that, anybody can run off a honky-tonk tune even if she has attended enough Ring Cycles to sink a battleship.

I will forward this to the school board miscreants, over which they will cudgel their brains, satire requiring grey cells in excess of the bare minimum required to run for school board.

School-board Femme Fatale Jennifer

Sung to the tune of “Beautiful, Beautiful Brown Eyes” with ukulele accompaniment if you don’t have handy a banjo. fiddle, and zither ensemble

School-board Jennifer femme fa-ta-le,

Lured ROSSAC feller to dal-ly,

Wouldn’t take no for an answer,

She’ll never get elected again.

School-board Jennifer home-wrecker,

Fibbed to press under pres--sure.

Lied about move out of district,

She’ll never get elected again.

Boss Elia provided Jennifer cover,

Up and fired femme fatale’s lover,

News got out on the grapevine,

She’ll never get elected again.

Other board members who knew the score,

Didn’t kick Jennifer out the door,

Awarded La Jennifer board gavel,

They’ll never get elected again.

Yodel-ay-hoo!

Yodel-ay—hoo!

Yodelay—hee-hee-hee--hoo!

Ye-haw hee-haw-hoo-who-dat?

Back in the saddle again.

Out where a friend is a friend.

Time to hit the trail, Chemosabe.

Gidd-yap, Trigger, etc.